Got so drunk last night, I thought I was a witch. How you doin?

This morning, while I was joking with the cashier at the grocery check-out about the strangeness of everyone wearing masks, he said, “Excuse me,” and partially removed his mask to readjust it, and for a brief moment I saw his mouth, AND IT WAS LIKE SEEING HIM NAKED. Full shock and averted eyes on both our parts. He blushed and apologized and smiled with the mouth I was fully not supposed to see.

I got in my first ever squabble in a group Zoom meeting last week, and I’m still not over it. Quite probably because I have very little to otherwise occupy my thoughts, but the interaction has been preying on my mind. I have a lot of scathing comments in me, but smacking someone down/clarifying my position via email rather than in person seems very Hamilton’s Obedient Servant.

And honestly, who needs more drama, right? Better to forgive and forget, chalk it up to the stress Everyone! Is! Under!, and let their slimy behavior slide.

Instead, in what’s turned out to be The Best Solution Ever, it led me to beg my favorite long distance friend to meet me over Skype with a glass of wine, and we made fun of the person and talked for over an hour, and I felt happy and normal and super grateful to workshop a problem that I can, at least theoretically, solve.

Anyway, I got too drunk and by very late evening felt sure I had some sort of witchlike magical properties, repressed all these years under loads of sobriety and lack of imagination. This, in combo with the fact I was drunk on white wine is probably peak suburban white woman. I tried to tell my husband’s fortune by way of palming his forehead, and I’m not sure how that worked out, but this morning when I complained of hangover, he laughed way too much, in a manner suggesting he was quite enjoying my unhappy turn of fortune.

But! Am meeting with same long distance friend tonight, with the remains of my wine, so she can have an hour to talk about her life and we will get drunk and make fun of her enemies, so I guess I will have another opportunity to research a) my previously unknown magical properties b) whatever I did last night that brought my husband such joy at my hangover this morning.

My kids teaching me history has taken on a war theme. Enjoy!

I have the honor to be your obedient servant,
A. Nahm