Uncategorized09 Jul 2008 12:37 pm

Food Porn: Carrot Edition

The last fight we had in our house was about:

If this carrot should wear pants.

subcategory a: I think he should. Why? What could be hiding under those pants?

subcategory b: That is disgusting.

subcategory c: Why do you have a tiny toilet in your possession?

subcategory d: Do you think it’s OK for your daughter to see that carrot without pants? Or even with pants? Pants on a carrot can mess I kid up, I bet.*

*No children saw this carrot, in or out of pants.

57 Responses to “Food Porn: Carrot Edition”

  1. on 09 Jul 2008 at 12:44 pm   blot

    im glad it’s not zuchinni

  2. on 09 Jul 2008 at 12:48 pm   Mr Lady

    No comment I could have left would have been better than Blot’s.

  3. on 09 Jul 2008 at 1:13 pm   Mary

    Oh, and where did the pants come from?

  4. on 09 Jul 2008 at 2:22 pm   All Adither

    There’s not much to see there, Mr. Carrot. Put your pants back on.

  5. on 09 Jul 2008 at 3:09 pm   Kelliqua

    Can I borrow that carrot for my family reunion?

  6. on 09 Jul 2008 at 3:19 pm   Natalie

    Holy obscene carrot!

    It looks like a drag-queen carrot to me. The Barbie pants and the feminine walk, but it is OBVIOUSLY a boy.

  7. on 09 Jul 2008 at 3:19 pm   the new girl

    Oh, dude.
    I’m SO HOT from that veggie porn.

    WHEW.

    Steamin’!

    Heh.

  8. on 09 Jul 2008 at 3:51 pm   jean

    snort, snicker.

  9. on 09 Jul 2008 at 4:31 pm   twomidnightblues

    Looks like Mr Carrot should consider a Camaro or something to overcompinsate.

  10. on 09 Jul 2008 at 5:19 pm   kat

    You’d make a fortune on eGay…. uh… eBay.

  11. on 09 Jul 2008 at 5:43 pm   Sam

    Your carrot makes me feel funny in my tummy.

  12. on 09 Jul 2008 at 6:23 pm   Kristne

    Best carrot evah!

  13. on 09 Jul 2008 at 7:19 pm   Deb (Missives From Suburbia)

    I’m not even sure it’s okay for ME to see that carrot without pants.

  14. on 09 Jul 2008 at 8:57 pm   Erica

    I am crying, with laughter, I think.

  15. on 09 Jul 2008 at 10:25 pm   Bess

    That looks like a niblet. Only smaller.

  16. on 09 Jul 2008 at 10:40 pm   Helen

    Heh! I am so going to show MY kids that carrot because it is so rude and they LOVE rude, it will make them laugh all day I suspect. I like that the carrot is sufficiently secure in his sexuality that he can wear grils pants. Cool carrot.

  17. on 09 Jul 2008 at 10:41 pm   Helen

    I mean GIRLS pants of course. Darn carrot fingers.

  18. on 09 Jul 2008 at 10:42 pm   Babybound

    Again, still diggen the carrot. Pants or no pants, that carrot should really have its own show.

  19. on 10 Jul 2008 at 4:45 am   Maria

    There is major shrinkage going on there Mr. Carrot. I think you should start praying to Baby J for help.

  20. on 10 Jul 2008 at 5:19 am   Tammy

    I wanna know…did you eat the carrot?

  21. on 10 Jul 2008 at 6:42 am   Greta/Does This Blog Make Us Look Fat

    Um…what the fuck kind of seeds did you use?

  22. on 10 Jul 2008 at 9:38 am   karen

    Forget the pants on the carrot! I laughed so hard I need to change MY pants!

  23. on 10 Jul 2008 at 10:24 am   MommyBrain

    Holy CARROT Pecker Batman! That is just hilarious… so yeah… did you EAT the carrot???

  24. on 10 Jul 2008 at 11:00 am   Jennifer

    in Pants, definitely. You should mark this one ‘not safe for work.’
    I had no idea there was need to censor the produce. Thank you for bringing this important issue to my attention.

  25. on 10 Jul 2008 at 11:04 am   Jozet at Halushki

    Does that carrot leek or pea in that tiny toilet?

    I bet if you gave that carrot some fiddlehead or a beetroot it would kumquat on your cress. ;-)

  26. on 10 Jul 2008 at 11:42 am   Caustic Cupcake

    That is the most incredible carrot I’ve ever seen.

    We spent so much time peeling potatoes at a restaurant I used to work at that inevitably someone would find a prurientato and we’d carry it around the kitchen all day, laughing.

    Peeling potatoes for that long can do things to your sensibilities.

  27. on 10 Jul 2008 at 12:15 pm   kristin

    I feel dirty.

  28. on 10 Jul 2008 at 5:46 pm   Kiki

    After looking at this post I bow down to your vegetable garden. I thought my veggie garden had it’s freak on. Wrong. My garden is like a protestant wedding reception at the church rectory. Yours is like the secret room at Studio 54 with Warhol and Jackie O.

  29. on 11 Jul 2008 at 5:55 am   sandiegomomma.com » Blog Archive » Veggie “Tails”

    [...] you eat this obscene carrot? Or send it to Las Vegas? « « Mars and Venus Visit The Planet [...]

  30. on 11 Jul 2008 at 8:01 am   Angela

    Oh my goodness…. all the other carrots must be so jealous!

  31. on 11 Jul 2008 at 9:18 am   Momma Mary

    I once found a horny tomato in my mother’s garden.

    Toooo funny!

  32. on 11 Jul 2008 at 10:27 am   Bump

    Pickle that carrot and sell it for a large pile on e-bay. You’d get it!

  33. on 11 Jul 2008 at 5:08 pm   mama's got moxie

    that is HILARIOUS!!! :)

  34. on 12 Jul 2008 at 12:02 am   Jenn

    I think that the Carrot should meet Baby J and Baby J could advise the carrot about how wrong porn is?

    This is classic Anne – I think I love you!

  35. on 12 Jul 2008 at 3:38 pm   stephanie (bad mom)

    Wait a minute – there was fighting over this carrot? Wearing pants?

    I love it so much.

  36. on 12 Jul 2008 at 11:37 pm   Jennifer H

    Bump said what I was going to suggest.

    And make a plaster cast of it while you’re at it. Soon.

    You know, before it gets limp.

  37. on 13 Jul 2008 at 10:57 am   manager mom

    Best. Vegetable. Post. Ever.

  38. on 13 Jul 2008 at 11:04 am   Jenny, Bloggess

    Oh. My. God.

  39. on 13 Jul 2008 at 11:14 am   andi

    And just when I was getting bored with my veggies.

    Poor Mr. Carrot. Was it cold in the room? Maybe that explains his, ahem, smallish member?

  40. on 13 Jul 2008 at 11:42 am   flickrlovr

    Funniest thing evah.
    ohmigawd.

    I have no words. It’s all been said before.

  41. on 13 Jul 2008 at 12:02 pm   Y

    I honestly can not stop laughing.

  42. on 13 Jul 2008 at 12:38 pm   Brenda

    Reminds me of a story I’d heard out of Victorian England, how an aristocratic lady was offended at the sight of doggy “bits.” And, thus, canines in the area were required to wear britches for a time. I don’t know if it’s true or not but I find that almost as comical as your naked carrot post! Too funny!

  43. on 13 Jul 2008 at 7:49 pm   Walking With Scissors

    I think I need to plant a vegetable garden…

  44. on 13 Jul 2008 at 8:58 pm   deb

    either you assembled that thing using multiple carrots, or you have just been visited by the god of testosterone-enriched carrots.

    whatever the case, will you please pray over me? because you have obviously been touched by something special. and i need some.

  45. on 14 Jul 2008 at 2:30 pm   jennie

    the carrot is fantastic. and of course it should wear pants.

  46. on 15 Jul 2008 at 3:07 pm   susan

    Still funny. And so completely believable that there was an entire conversation as to whether or not Mr. Carrot should be clothed. (Which might very well explain why it is so damn funny…)

  47. on 17 Jul 2008 at 10:56 am   coolteamblt

    What a silly argument! I firmly believe that the carrot is in his private home (see the toilet?) and should be able to choose to wear pants or not. It’s really hot in the summer, after all.

  48. on 18 Jul 2008 at 12:22 pm   Lori

    I have NEVER laughed so hard from reading something. This is the funniest thing ever and I just showed all my office mates. I was referred from Blog Nosh and will be back!

  49. on 18 Jul 2008 at 3:29 pm   savia

    I found you through Five Star Friday – couldn’t resist the title of the post.

    That carrot could have a great little career as a flasher. He just needs a trench coat and a sign that says “Eat me.”

  50. on 18 Jul 2008 at 4:42 pm   Sara Duckett

    Just found your blog for the first time via the Blog Nosh site. I was crackin up over your pregnancy test post, so I came to check out your site… and low and behold this is the first post I see.

    You are sick, and twisted, and I love it. As a frequent user/waster of pregnancy tests myself (six years of fertitly issues) it is nice to think of them on a lighter more postive note. And I’m very glad to see they don’t like being pee’d on as some of them have been down right rude to me! :)

  51. on 20 Jul 2008 at 7:06 am   Good Mom / Bad Mom

    BS Sunday…

    By Jennifer…you know….Hailey’s Mom It is Sunday in beautiful Houston Texas and I’m Jenny (aka bloggess) and I will be your hostess for this morning’s blogshare. (Okay, I’m not really Jenny…it’s me….Mindy…but I’m trying to keep busy and …

  52. on 20 Jul 2008 at 7:34 pm   Midwest Mommy

    Oh my gosh, you made me giggle out loud :-)

  53. on 22 Jul 2008 at 12:37 pm   Genevieve

    Crying laughing here. CRYING LAUGHING for the past two minutes.

    Found your blog via BlogNosh.com.

  54. on 22 Jul 2008 at 1:17 pm   Brillig

    HAHAHAHA! That’s so incredibly hilarious– not just the carrot, but that you had pants for it (or “him” I should say) and a tiny toilet. HAHAHA. This is one of the funniest things I’ve seen/read in ages!

  55. on 22 Jul 2008 at 7:15 pm   Lotta

    Please put that on ebay. It just may fund your next vacation and end up on Leno!

  56. on 28 Jul 2008 at 4:43 pm   elizasmom.com » Dear Anne Nahm

    [...] do you think? Do they have a future together? (Is he into kink? Because that might help, with the tail and [...]

  57. on 29 Jul 2008 at 12:55 pm   nanc

    Brilliant! Thanks for the laugh.